Valentine's Day Part #1: Questions and Pick Up Lines

Check out Part 2!
Let's do questions first.
Who is your current crush? Who was your first crush?
I like the orange soda, too. I don't have a Crush soda though. Just some apple cider. I wonder why the makers of Candy Crush haven't sued them yet?

Crushes make us young. I am frankly attracted to someone at the moment. She has blondish, brownish, long hair-ish. From College Plus? No names, lest I embarrass her. Cause she probably doesn't have a clue that I do. Maybe. ;)

I kept this answer intentionally vague. :P

My first crush's name was Millicent Rose in kindergarten. She's also the first girl I've taken a picture with. I have no idea where the picture is.

Why am I single?
There are countless alternate universes where you are NOT single. So have consolation in the fact that one of you in another alternate universe has a perfect girlfriend that loves you and cherishes you and marries you, happily ever after.

Unfortunately, travel between universes are not allowable by our current technology and/or laws of physics.

Why do we love?
We love because God has first loved us. And also, chocolate. Also, chemical interactions in our brains. Also, peer pressure. Also, the butterflies in our stomach and meeting someone's eyes. And knowing you will never going to be with that person.

Favorite love song(s)?
Right now, "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri, but also "My Girl" by the Temptations, and "Fur Elise" by Bach. Also, I call them sentimental songs, not love songs. Oh, and "Jesus Loves Me, This I Know"! :D

Courting or dating?
I subscribe to this thing called "courtation". Okay, I'm kidding. I will have my thesis on it post as separate, so check that out. I kinda define that dating is before engagement, and courting is after engagement.

Qualities in girls you like?
I only like girls who are virtuous, godly, good, beautiful, and single. Oh, and she must have cookies for me.

Who is my favorite historical couple?
I ship Adam and Eve, Valentine and Asterius' daughter, Doctor and River Song, Jesus Christ and His Bride (though technically a future thing). Bonnie and Clyde; and Marie and Pierre Curie did not make the list, unfortunately.

My favorite is probably Prince Albert and Queen Victoria of England. They are a model every family, royal or otherwise, should aspire to.

How did the heart morph from a fist-shaped organ to the cute little shape we see everywhere today?
The first instances of the use of the so-called geometric heart shape was during the Middle Ages in the use of decoration (Think of the decorated medieval books and Bibles with pictures). But it was not identified as a heart and a symbol of love until around the 13th century, where it was depicted as a pine cone shape in the hands of a knight giving it to his damsel in distress. It appears in various paintings from then on. The current form was finalized around the 14th or so century, and the hearts on playing card games came around the 15th.

In my opinion, the heart-shape is actually more accurate, but exaggerated, than it is given credit for. A normal heart has four chambers, and a somewhat pointed bottom. Also, Cupid cannot hit anyone with his heart arrows without the point. So it does have a practical purpose.

But yes, it went from a fist, to a pine cone, to a the pointed cardiod shape today.Neat, huh?

Which is better to give your Valentine, roses or chocolates?
Chocolate roses. Sprinkled with bacon. A whole bouquet. I don't care if you have money to afford this, steal, plunder, beg, save, invest, so you can have enough. Always, always go over the top on Valentine's Day for your love. Your Valentine will always have a fond memory of you. I promise.

Now for some pickup lines!
Christian pickups:
I've been reading the book of Numbers, and I realized I don't have yours.
Are you my babe in Christ?
Hi, my name is Will. God's Will.
Is your name Grace? Cause you are amazing.
Can I have your name and number for my prayer list?
Is that a mirror in your Bible? Cause you are reflecting the image of Christ.
Is it a sin to steal my heart?
Before this night, I never believed in predestination.
Is this pew taken?
I've picked out our chaperones.
You're a Proverbs 31 kind of woman.
Is your name Faith? Because you are the substance of things hoped for!

Doctor Who pickups:
Will you be my companion?
My heart for you is bigger on the inside.
Babe, you make both of my hearts skip a beat.
We have all of time and space to get acquainted.
Come along, Pond!
You're my fixed point in time.
You must be a weeping angel, because I can't take my eyes off you.

Bonus pickups:
Hey, do you have my hairbrush? Because you are a real peach. (Veggie Tales)

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any eye rolling, face slapping, indiscriminate laughter, cold shoulders, heart breaking or otherwise from the use of the above pickup lines. Use them at your own peril. I will, however, take credit for any engagements and marriages resulting from such use. And invite me to the wedding. Please. Or even have me officiate the wedding! :D

Thanks to Rikki Meek, Hannah Musick, Joshua Loomis, Drew Sproule, Skip Graham, Faith Burnside, Sarah Iddings, Garret Johnson, and everyone else who submitted a line or question or suggestion, or I did otherwise steal from you.

Check out Part 2!

Relationship Ramblings, Or, Why Sam Doesn't Have A Girlfriend

Another rare post about *cough* girls. Or, actually, relationships. Or something. No, just random ramblings without construction about the fact of relationships or lack thereof.

Everyone I know seems to ask me if I have a girlfriend, or if I'm courting. My grandma, cousins, family, relatives, strangers, friends from church and college, authority figures, teachers, pastors, random people....

I keep telling them, No, not yet, me? I have to... earn money, finish college, stuff like that. That I'm very, very picky. That I only want one girlfriend, and that she'll be my future wife someday. That I want to be patient and be very careful.

And that's all true. They're not really excuses, or at least bad ones. But what I don't tell many people is that I think I know who she is.

But I don't tell them. Because I feel like I fail in everything I plan concerning these things. Always waiting and waiting for weeks to build up courage. Always failing to ask in time for a date to the banquet. Always resigning whenever the one you ask tells you that, in a deflating tone of voice, why she can't go out with you. Always feeling too dejected to try again in the foreseeable future.

(That's why I look forward to the bi-annual dancing balls where the Scottish music plays around here in Ohio every spring and winter. At least there, no lady will reject any gentleman who asks her for just a single dance. And all dance as friends, not any more than such. There is no dating or any such romantic matter. Just merely fun and laughs. But I digress.)

Some people have caught on a little bit on who she would be. Or maybe, they already know for sure who she will be, as if God reveals it to them, not to me. I think He does, though. Either that, or there's a huge conspiracy going on. Them peoples making little snide, seemingly harmless jokes here and there, and I just smile and shrug it off.

It's probably my fault. Making little art game in dedication to a certain, specific mademoiselle was not the most subtle thing I could have done for Valentine's Day. I don't regret doing that, though.

People are smarter than you think. They observe you. They know more.

I think she even knows. Maybe. Or maybe she actually dislikes me a lot. Or thinks me amusing. I never really asked. Sometimes I want to know. Sometimes I don't want to know.

It's been a long time since we were together for any reason. We used to go to school. And to youth group activities. And nowadays, I only see her at church, rarely. I think we naturally avoid each other. I can probably count only a handful of times where we both were in proximity of less than one feet from each other. And most of those times were more or less forced. It made me hesitant and uncomfortable and yet strangely hopeful.

You probably can tell she occupies my thoughts a lot. Trust me, I tried forgetting. And erasing my memory. And finding another to take her place in my heart. To no avail. And that's one reason I know it's her.

Even then....

What am I supposed to do, though? Every opportunity I ever had has disappeared and it doesn't seem like any will come. I'm just quiet now. Waiting. Dreaming. Watching. Hoping. Praying. Looking out my window to see a winter wonderland.

I've just accepted the fact that if we were indeed meant for each other, that God will bring us together one day.

I love her. I trust Him.

Thee Infamous Valentine's Banquet

Yes, I spelled "the" "thee". What are you going to do about it, grammar/spelling nazi?

It's a strange ritual. A boy asks a girl to accompany him to a night of food, games, photographs, and awkwardness. To top it all off, he must go shopping for clothes to match the girl.

Yes, it's that time of year again.... The time where I try to find a girl to ask out to the infamous High Street Baptist Church Youth Department Valentine's Banquet. I'm doing it early this year, since it's my last.

And I know who it is. ;)

So guys, pray for me. Please?

The Banquet on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/events/300684746650473/